Are you always looking for others to approve of you?
For them to say “you’re doing great", “you look perfect” or “you’re such a good person?
Do you feel bad about yourself when someone judges you in a less than kind way?
Do you find you feel crappy if you go for too long without a compliment, without someone else validating you?
I used to have this block in a massive way & I struggled constantly with feeling like I had to please everyone all of the time. Do you have this problem?
It’s draining on yourself & those around you coz your expectations of them & their opinions are so high that you stop allowing them to show up authentically with you.
You're in a never ending search for approval from others & you’ll never feel worthy because others make their judgments without fully knowing who you are on a soul level & also filtered through their own wounded versions of themselves making it impossible for them to ever fully know you & your true value.
You put a whole lot of pressure on them to keep you feeling worthy which creates friction within your interactions.
The truth is, it’s not up to anyone on this planet or anywhere else, to decide your worth.
You’ve not only been allowing this, but demanding it the whole time by handing over that power to others.
Now what’s happening on an energetic level is that you’ve attached your level of self worth to the opinions of others as well different objects & experiences to determine what your value is.
This can happen when you have an experience where maybe you’ve done really well at something & someone gives you a compliment. If you’ve never been taught to identify your own self worth then you begin to use this as a gauge of how good you are.
We also attach our self worth to different things, like a handbag, a car, a house to name a few. We decide that if we don’t have that item then we aren’t good enough or if we don’t look a certain way then we aren’t good enough!
This happens when you see someone who you decide is hugely valued to you & they may have certain items so you decide in that moment that if you're to be valued the same, then you need to have those items too.
Not only is this not true but it can also put you in the poor house as our dad would say, coz you're forever chasing material items to give you a level of value which just simply can't be altered by material goods or by the opinions of others.
To connect with & understand this fully will give you a freedom that you may not have given yourself before, the freedom to show up & share yourself with the world in a more authentic way coz you no longer fear that your value will change.
Let's get practical shall we?
So how do I change this?
Decide you’re going to uncover your own self worth by looking within.
Look beyond the superficial layers of how you identify yourself like your appearance & your material belongings & begin to notice what’s beneath.
The parts of you that inspire, care for & love. The parts of you that you don’t acknowledge to yourself every day but want others to see in you & point out in those short interactions.
If you can’t see it within yourself, then how can you expect others to see it!!
So try looking a little deeper than you normally do before you leave the house & head out into the world looking for that elusive approval.
When you check the mirror to make sure you look awesome, look into your eyes & check how you look in there.
Like, "ok, do I have my kind on?"
"Do I have love with me for others to enjoy as well as myself?"
"Did I remember to put on my compassion & understanding?"
Then ask yourself, "what else do I want to bring with me into my day to help make my day & my interactions flow with ease & grace?"
Then check it’s there.
Hint: This stuff is ALWAYS with you coz it’s part of your True Essence, it can’t be left behind it can only be forgotten about & not used;-)
So lovely as you head off now, remember that only you can uncover your true value which you can use to decide your level of self worth & all you need to do is to start connecting with it internally.
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